Happy Thanksgiving to all the black nails, black Fridays, long-haired hippies, and other racist-Friday shoppers with their ugly Christmas sweaters!
BLACK “FLYDAY”! THE TIME OF YEAR YOU START TO BE THANKFUL UNTIL YOU NEED THAT WAFFLE IRON AND YOU’LL KILL FOR IT!
Random Noodle Updates
Daniel gave a hair and nails update.
Jenny shared a special story, inspired by Strongbad’s “Everybody to the Limit“:
Once upon a time, there were two fawns named Moop and Mortimer. Moop was a Parkle fawn, and Mortimer was a Frickle fawn. They were best friends, and both were on a pilgrimage to the shrine of the Great Big Sweater gods where they would offer their sacrifices of fresh peach fuzz.
Equipped with their razors and peaches, Moop and Mortimer set off toward the forest of the song monkeys to get there. They clip-clopped into the shade of the first bubblegum tree armed with a music box and a singing Princess Petunia doll. A squeeze bottle of ketchup was produced from Mortimer’s pack for tracking their way.
Mortimer wound the key on his music box, and Moop readied his finger on Princess Petunia’s belly button. Both were listening for the sound of song monkeys.
As the ketchup sputtered out of the bottle, Mortimer was carefully avoiding the largest and loudest bubblegum wrappers that had fallen off the trees and were now scattered across the forest floor. Moop however was noisily crunching over them, holding Princess Petunia at arm’s length with both his thumbs firmly placed on the doll’s belly button. Crunch-clip crunch-clop. They went deeper into the forest listening cautiously.
As they neared the heart of the forest, the sound of a beating drum grew louder with each crunchy step. At least a dozen song monkeys grinned at the pair of fawns now below them. Moop and Mortimer were straining hard now to listen for the sound of an approach over the bang of the drum. They paused at the distant sound of a wail.
Suddenly there was a shocking sound of screeching from directly behind them. Mortimer startled and spun around. Moop jumped and pressed his thumbs with all his might into Princess Petunia’s belly button, and he threw her in the direction of the screeching, but without much accuracy because his eyes were shut tightly.
Moop stood, covering his ears while Mortimer watched Princess Petunia land. the screeching stopped just in time for Moop and Mortimer to hear the dying sound of Princess Petunia’s batteries die mid-song. the silence lasted for only a moment before the monkeys sprang from the trees. The screeching resumed as Mortimer opened the lid of his music box. the closest monkeys halted to examine the tiny ballerina turn on her little spring. A plunky melody played. Mortimer set the box down. The monkeys listened as the two fawns crept away.
On the edge of the forest now, Mortimer capped his ketchup and put it back into his pack. the two started their ascent up the mountain to shave their peaches before the shrine of their beloved Great Big Sweater gods.
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